


Devotion

by jsalhey89



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Angst and Romance, But Clearly Not Canon, Canon Universe, Final Fantasy XV - Freeform, IgNoct, M/M, Pining, Self-Discovery, Sexual Confusion, Sexual Identity, Slow Build, Slow Romance, Tags May Change
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-11
Updated: 2020-01-16
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:00:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22208290
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jsalhey89/pseuds/jsalhey89
Summary: Something's wrong with Ignis, but he can't quite figure out what. Noctis wrestles with the emotional weight of betrothal to a person he is unsure he loves.
Relationships: Noctis Lucis Caelum/Ignis Scientia
Comments: 4
Kudos: 29





	1. Beneath the Surface

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading my first fanfic. Please go easy on me as I’m new to this world. There are two major things to keep in mind when reading.
> 
> The story follows the actual FFXV storyline as it progresses through the game. The universe is mostly the same, though details and events have been altered. Dialogue is quite different than the game. Please cut me some slack if there are inconsistencies.  
> The music was so important to this game and is a major part of what makes it shine. Each section has a recommended song to listen to during that section. Most tracks are from the OST, though there may be some songs that are not related to FFXV. Try to listen as you read. It will really enhance the story.

Chapter 1

(Music - Hammerhead)

Noctis crossed his arms and pressed his back against the wall outside the diner. He took a deep breath and let out an audible sigh. It was only 2 PM on the first day of their trip, and everything had already gone to shit. Their car had broken down, and they had spent a good part of the morning pushing it down the highway and hoping that Hammerhead Garage was around the next curve. 

By the time the four young men had arrived at Hammerhead, they were exhausted, dehydrated, and thoroughly pissed off. Noctis had stormed away from the others. He’d had enough of Prompto’s whining, Gladio's bitching, and Ignis’s silent disapproval. He needed a little space to breathe.

It was somewhat strange for Noctis to be outside and not bombarded by the noise of busy streets. Insomnia was a huge city, and Hammerhead was a small rest stop in central Leide surrounded by nothing but desert. It was peaceful to not feel overwhelmed by the hustle and bustle of the city, and Noctis found the tension easing faster than he had anticipated. He closed his eyes for a brief rest, but his respite was quickly disturbed by the sound of whispers.

"...do you... is it...” Without moving his head, Noct turned his eyes toward the sound of the whispering. . Two teenage girls stood just around the corner of the building. Their hands were over their mouths, and they were staring right at him. 

“Ugh, give me a break.” Noct thought to himself. “It never ends. I guess I should get this over with.” He stood up and made his way toward the two girls. As he approached them he could see the blood draining from their faces. Noct stopped in front of them and gave an unenergetic wave. “Hey.”

“Oh. My. God...” The end of the last word was choked off as the girl on the left lost her ability to speak. The other girl finished her thought. “You’re...”

“Noctis Lucis Caelum, Son of King Regis, Crown Prince of Lucis. Yeah, that’s me.” He fidgeted with the straps on his glove. Prompto always called him out on it, and he really only did it when he was tired or overwhelmed. “Can I get you all an autograph or something?” 

Noct recoiled when the girl on the left began to squeal in excitement. Thankfully, her squeals abruptly ended when she passed out and hit the ground. “Prince Noctis, I mean, Your Majesty, or.... err... Your Royalest Highness?” The girl on the right looked embarrassed at her lack of knowledge of royal etiquette. She gave Noct a crooked smile and then and began digging through her backpack. “I’ve gotta have a piece of paper here somewhere....”

“Might I be of assistance?” Noct turned around at the sound of Ignis ripping a sheet of paper from his recipe book. “Your Highness, might you give this young lady your autograph that we may be on our way? Your princely schedule is rather full of royal activities today.” Ignis extended his gloved hand, offering the slip of paper and a pen to him.

“Oh, uh, yeah. Right.” Noct quickly scrawled his name on the paper and handed it to girl. “I’m sorry, my princely duties await. Have a nice day ladies.” The girl on the right stood frozen with the paper in her hand as Noct and Ignis turned and walked away. The girl on the left remained hysterically incapacitated on the ground. 

Noct chuckled. “Thanks Iggy, I owe you one.” 

Ignis put his recipe book back in his pocket and straightened his glasses. He put his hand on Noct’s shoulder. “Of course Noct. Just take care to remember that just because you are no longer in the Crown City does not mean people won’t recognize you.” 

Ignis turned around and looked toward the garage on the other side of the lot. “I shall check on the status of the Regalia. Perhaps you should seek out Prompto and Gladio to determine what our plans for the evening will be.”

Noct scratched his head and pushed the hair out of his eyes. “Yeah, okay, I guess so.” His response was too late, however, as Ignis was already halfway across the lot. He rolled his eyes. “Always telling me what to do...” 

Without acknowledging them a second time, Noct walked past the tittering girls and into the diner. He looked across the room to see Prompto and Gladio sitting at a booth. On the table were two glasses of water and a nearly empty plate of french fries. He walked up to the table and laughed. “That’s all you ordered? You guys on a diet or something?” 

Gladio grunted. He reached out and slapped Noct on the chest with the back of his hand. “Do we look like we’re rolling in the dough here? All the money went to the garage for the repairs.”

Prompto reached across the table and slapped Gladio on the head. “Hey, you can’t hit royalty!” he barked. 

Noct slid into the booth next to Prompto, nearly knocking him over. “Shhh, guys, you’ll blow our cover. Between those fangirls outside and that loudmouth mechanic...”

“Don’t you talk about Cindy that way!” Prompto yelled defensively. He elbowed Noct in the ribs, and the two began a shoving match in the seat of the booth. 

Gladio reached across the table and grabbed both of them by the hair. “Stop it dumbasses, or I’ll smash both of your heads like watermelons.” Just as the two reached up to try to pry Gladio’s huge hands off their heads, he let go. Noct and Prompto looked up to see Ignis standing at the end of the table. He was glaring at them, clearly irritated.

“Stop acting like children. You’re drawing attention to yourselves, which is the last thing we need right now.” Ignis snatched the check off the table and began walking toward the cash register. He paused a moment. “Repairs on the Regalia will not be complete until tomorrow morning. Meet me by the RV outside in 5 minutes.” he said with his back turned. 

Prompto bowed his head. “Why is he always so bossy…” He reached up and ran his hands through his spiky blond hair, smoothing out the spot where Gladio had grabbed him. 

“He’s a lot, but I think he’s just trying to be helpful.” Noct said defensively. No one knew Ignis better than Noct, but even he didn’t quite have him figured out. Despite having grown up with Noct since they were children, Ignis clearly had no intention of letting his guard down anytime soon. “Always trying to fix everybody’s problems…” Noct thought to himself. 

“Yeah, well he could be a little less of an uptight prick about it.” Gladio muttered under his breath. He scratched the two-day stubble on his face and looked up. “Time to get going. Let’s head over to the RV and get some rest.” 

The three of them stood up and walked to the door. As they made their way out of the diner, Noct paused for a moment. Gladio and Prompto took a few steps more before they realized Noct had stopped. 

“What are you doing, come on…” Prompto gesture to Noct, pointing toward the RV. 

“You guys go on ahead, I’ll be over there in a second.”

“Okay, whatever.” Gladio shoved Prompto from behind. He flew forward, nearly stumbling over his feet but catching himself before he faceplanted. Prompto stood up and moped his way across the parking lot. 

Even though they had been friends for a long time, Noct still found it humorous seeing them side by side. Prompto looked comically small compared to Gladio. At 6’6”, his hulking muscular frame towered over the lanky Prompto who only stood 5’8”. 

Noct couldn’t help but notice that Gladio seemed to give Prompto a harder time than the others. He was always shoving him around or slapping him on the back of the head. He would flex his massive biceps or lift his shirt to show off his abs while making fun of Prompto for being puny. “What’s Gladio got against him?” he wondered. 

Noct sat down on the bench outside of the diner. He couldn’t stop thinking about the goal of the mission they were on. Get to Altissia so he and the Oracle could marry. Noct hadn’t seen Luna in years, but they kept in touch. He felt a closeness to her - a childhood memory of pure friendship that they had. Their communication through her dog Umbra was all they had remaining of this connection, and he wondered what she looked like today. They had been close, yes. But marrying her? 

Noct lowered his face into his hands. He began thinking to himself. “I care for her, sure. She’s special. I really can’t wait to see her - ask her how she’s been, what is her life like?” He ran his fingers down his cheeks and looked up toward the sky. “I mean, do I love her though? Do I want to marry her? Or does it even fucking matter what I want?” Noct felt that the last thing anyone cared about right now was his feelings. It had been agreed that he would marry Luna as part of the peace agreement between Lucis and Niflheim. Screw what he wanted, it was what his father had decided was best for the Kingdom. Mentally exhausted, he rubbed his cold blue eyes with his fists. 

“Procrastinating again I see.” Ignis appeared from around the corner and stood in front of Noct. He looked at his watch. “You look drained. Perhaps you should turn in early this evening.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right.” Noct replied reluctantly. He stood up and started walking across the parking lot toward the RV. Before he could take another step he felt a hand on his shoulder. 

“Noct. Are you all right? You seem... distracted.” Noct stopped for a moment. He turned his head and looked down at the hand on his shoulder, and then at Ignis. 

“Yeah, I’m okay. Just tired I guess.” He turned his head forward and resumed walking. 

Ignis let his hand drop to his side. Something was going on with Noct, and he was a bit worried. He knew Noct had a lot on his mind. Could it be leaving the city at such a tumultuous time? Leaving the comfort of home? Pre-nuptial nerves? If Noct would just open up maybe he could help in some way. Even if he couldn’t, at least he could be there to listen. Ignis lowered his head and closed his eyes. 

“I hope he’s all right.”

——————

(Music - Relax and Reflect, Pensive)

Prompto jumped onto the couch, dressed in an oversized t-shirt and baggy basketball shorts. He crossed his legs and poked Ignis in the arm. “Hey Iggy, do you think Cindy likes me?”

“Dear gods, this again?” Ignis lowered his pocket book and put his pen on the table. “Considering you just met her today, I would say she likely has little opinion of you.”

The four were sitting crammed into the small living space in the center of the RV. Gladio, in a tank top and pajama pants, sat reading some unknown book in the recliner. Noct wore an old t-shirt and sweatpants, sitting cross-legged and barefoot aside Prompto on the couch. Ignis was still fully clothed, wearing a silver button-down shirt with suspenders, neatly pressed slacks, and boots. He had been sitting at the small dining table writing in his book until the nonsense with Prompto started.

“Aw, c’mon! You saw the way she looked at me, right Noct?” Prompto poked Noct in the side. Noct squirmed the other direction, his eyes never leaving the screen of his phone. 

“Yeah she was looking at you all right. Not for the reasons you think though.” Noct threw his phone on the floor, groaning angrily. “Dammit, this stupid game!”

Gladio lowered his book. “Careful Noct, daddy’s not here to buy you a new one if you break it again…” 

Noct bent over and picked it up off the floor. “Screw you…” As Noct stood up, Prompto leapt off the couch and tackled him playfully. The two of them hit the floor, rolling around in the tiny living space. 

Noct struggled to push himself off the floor as Prompto pinned him from above. “Aw Noct, if you get a foxy lady like Luna, don’t I deserve a girl like Cindy?” For a moment Gladio watched amused as the two tussled on the floor, and then returned to his book. 

“Dude, get off of me!” Noct pushed his open palm into Prompto’s face, and he backed off. His freckled cheek was now graced with a hand-shaped red imprint. Noct collected himself from the floor, brushing dust off of his t-shirt. He looked Prompto directly in the eyes, steaming with anger. “Don’t you ever fucking do that again.”

Prompto’s innocently smiling face turned to one of sadness and hurt. Had he taken it too far? He knew Noct was really sensitive about the topic of Luna. Or was it the wrestling part? He wasn’t sure, but his face flushed red with shame. “Dude, I’m sorry, I was just messing around…”

“Well don’t. And leave Luna out of it.” Noct noticed a slight burning on his arm. He looked down to see a flap of skin torn back on his forearm. A small amount of blood trickled down to his fingers. “Shit. Look what you did Prompto…”

Prompto’s bright blue eyes dimmed and turned glassy. “I’m sorry Noct… I was just…” 

Prompto hung his head and sunk back into the couch. Noct turned toward the bedroom next to the couch. “I’m going to bed.” He quickly disappeared behind the curtain into the dark. 

Ignis stood up from the table where he had been observing the tussle. and followed behind him. Noct was standing in front of the sink, examining the injury in the dim light. Ignis took his arm and turned it over, exposing the wound. “Come now, let’s get that taken care of.” 

Noct jerked his arm away. “I’m not a kid, Iggy, I can take care of myself.”

Ignis stood calmly and simply looked at him. “Well, at least let me get you a bandage.” He turned on the light above the sink and picked up his satchel from beside the bed. . 

Ignis pulled a bottle of rubbing alcohol, some cotton balls, some medical tape, and a roll of gauze out of the bag. He handed them to Noct one at a time, maintaining a distance. “Here you are. Clean the wound with the alcohol and then wrap it with a bandage.” Noct took the supplies in his hands, though it ended up being more than he could carry. He looked at Ignis with frustration as he dropped all the supplies on the floor.

Noct grabbed his hair in irritation. “Can’t I just use a potion and get it over with?” Noct looked down at the supplies, letting out a hefty sigh. He examined his arm, which was starting to crust over a bit. 

“We shan’t waste a potion on such a minor injury.” Ignis noticed the frustration in Noct’s eyes. “Are you certain you don’t want help?”

Noct lowered his head, looking defeated. “I guess.” 

Ignis opened the bottle of alcohol and poured a bit onto the cotton ball. He gently grasped Noct’s arm and looked up at him. “This will…”

“I know, it will sting. Just get it over with.” Ignis began to dab the cotton ball on the wound, and Noct winced. It burned, but it wasn’t as painful as he had suspected. Each dab of the cotton ball hurt less, and by the time the wound was disinfected the pain was actually better than before. He applied a bit more alcohol and wiped the remaining blood from Noct’s arm.

Ignis threw the used cotton balls in the trash and picked up the gauze. He began to tenderly wrap Noct’s arm, dressing the wound. He paused briefly, looking up at Noct. “Is everything all right? It seems that perhaps more is bothering you than just Prompto’s antics.” 

Noct met Ignis’s gaze for a moment but quickly turned away. “I told you earlier, I’m okay. Just a lot on my mind.” There certainly was a lot on his mind. It bothered Noct that he was put on guard by any mention of Luna. He should be happy to talk about her. What was it about the whole situation that caused him to throw up his defenses? 

Ignis finished the final wrap of the gauze and secured it with medical tape. He took a step back to admire work. “I don’t quite believe you, but I respect your desire to keep your thoughts to yourself. Just know that I am here if you need to talk.”

Noct softened a bit. “... sure. Thanks.” He didn’t quite know what to say. If there was anyone on Eos he felt he could trust it was Iggy. But not with this. It was too raw. Too complicated. “I think I’m gonna head to bed.”

Ignis nodded. “Yes, that’s probably wise. We have a lot of traveling ahead of us tomorrow.” 

“Yeah. Thanks for the help tonight.” Noct climbed into the bed and under the covers. He felt he should have said something more - something that really expressed how helpful Ignis has been to him. Noct turned over on his side, hugged the pillow tight, and closed his eyes. Ignis turned toward the partition and flipped off the light. The lights from the other room peeked through the curtain, but the room was otherwise dark. He looked down over his glasses into the room before he passed through the curtain. 

“Goodnight, Noct.”

———————-

(Music - Urban Chrome)

It couldn’t have been a more beautiful day to ride in a convertible. Ignis prided himself on maintaining a calm and collected persona, but he did get a thrill out of a few things. Being behind the wheel and feeling the wind blowing through his thick blond hair was definitely one of them. As advisor, retainer, and tactician, it would make sense that he would be the one to drive. The real reason - the thrill - he kept a secret. A silly secret to keep for sure, but Ignis had developed a true skill in concealing his thoughts and feelings. His three companions never knew what was going on in his head, but they recognized they could count on him to guide them on the right path. And that path currently led to Galdin Quay, where they planned to take the boat to Altissia. 

Ignis could hear Prompto blathering on about this and that - how awesome chocobos are, how cool the Disc of Cauthess looked in the distance. He paid little mind until one conversation caught his attention. 

Prompto practically stood up in the car, turning around in his seat. “Hey Noct, I’m gonna snap a few more shots today than normal. Anyone in particular you want me to catch?”

Noct looked briefly at the back of Ignis’s head and shifted his attention back to Prompto. “Take some shots of Specs. You haven’t gotten many of him lately.”

“That’s cause he never smiles. Always giving the poker face, huh Iggy?” Prompto gave Ignis a gentle shove, but accidentally hit the wheel of the car. 

Ignis inhaled sharply. “Careful, Prompto!” The car veered to the left suddenly, but Ignis quickly regained control. He guided the Regalia back to the right side of the road. 

“Whoa, sorry bro… didn’t mean to do that.” Prompto turned forward in his seat, sinking down like a scolded child. 

Gladio slapped the back of Prompto’s seat. “Sit your ass down for a while, I’m not about to get killed today.” he said gruffly. He sighed as he buckled his seatbelt. 

Ignis’s breathing had returned to normal, but he still felt a bit disoriented. Not from the near-miss of a car crash, but at Noct’s statement about wanting more pictures of him. It seemed odd - perhaps a bit out of character for Noct to choose him. Under normal circumstances he would have likely given a simple “I don’t care” and gone back to sleep. 

“Hey, look!” Prompto started to jump out of his seat but quickly caught himself. He pointed to the front of the car and into the distance The arid plains gave way to sparkling ocean. They were almost there. “Galdin Quay, here we come!”

“I wonder if they have hamburgers. I’m starving.” Noct rubbed his eyes with his fists, trying to shake off the sleepiness. It was 9 AM. 

Ignis had regained focus. “It’s a bit early for hamburgers. Perhaps an omelet would be a better option?” Since they were teenagers, he had tried to steer Noct toward foods that he could sneak some vegetables into. An omelet wasn’t an ideal choice, but he might be able to get the restaurant to fold some peppers or onions inside. Noct might eat a couple of bites before he started picking them out. 

Noct scratched his chest and yawned. “Yeah okay, I guess. As long as it’s got cheese I’m fine.” 

———————

(Music - Galdin Quay)

“Welcome to Galdin Quay!”

“Prompto, can you just not… I’m exhausted.” Noct turned toward him and crossed his arms.

“Dude, that wasn’t me!” Prompto pointed behind Noct, and he turned around to face an overly cheerful young man. The man waved at Noct with entirely too much energy. 

“Oh. Uhh…. Sorry.” Noct chuckled quietly to himself. He was still a bit groggy from his nap in the car, but by that point he had woken up enough to realize his mistake. He waved back at the man and continued to walk along the pier with the others. 

He looked around. The place was beautiful. The ocean sparkled in the clear midday sun. Relaxing music drifted from a guitarist tucked away in the corner. It would be a perfect place to spend a few days, retreating from the craziness of Insomnia. Unfortunately, their stay would be a short one. The boat to Accordo would leave in the morning. 

“Come, let’s check in to the room. Afterward we can take lunch.” Ignis said without turning around. He headed toward the reception desk, followed by Gladio carrying the luggage. Ignis approached the reception desk and rang the bell. A well-dressed young woman walked out from behind the partition. 

“Good afternoon sir. Do you have a reservation with us?” She flashed a standard customer service smile. 

“Yes, under Scientia. Two beds and two rollaways.” He pulled his wallet from his pocket and presented the receptionist with his identification. Noct was glad Ignis had made the reservation under his own name. He wasn’t in the mood today to deal with people freaking out about the Prince of Lucis visiting their resort. 

The receptionist looked at her reservation log. “I’m sorry Mr. Scientia, it appears we don’t have any rollaways available this evening. I understand it’s an inconvenience, so I will discount your stay tonight.”

Ignis did not bat an eye. “Yes, it is an inconvenience. Though I appreciate you adjusting the cost.” Ignis quickly signed the check-in sheet and took the keys from the receptionist. He turned around and faced the others. “Let’s get to the room and unpack. We can sort out sleeping arrangements later.”

“That’s bullshit. I would have complained.” Gladio snorted, irritated. He picked up the bags and threw them over his shoulder. 

Noct shrugged. “I guess it’s only for one night. We have to get up early for the boat anyway.” 

(Music - ARDYN) 

“You’re out of luck.” A melodically deep voice floated from behind them. The four turned around to observe a man smiling at them - tall with long reddish-brown hair. He wore a black fedora, and was swaddled in heavy clothing as if it were a cold winter day. 

“Scuse me?” Gladio replied. 

“It appears that there is a delay with the boats. You’ll not leave today I think.” The man’s smile shifted to more of a smirk. 

Noct cocked his head to the side, confused. “And who are you?”

“A man of no importance. Pay me no mind, just trying to be helpful.”

Ignis stepped in front of Noct and crossed his arms defensively. “Thank you for the information. Though I am curious how did you know our intent was to travel by boat today?”

The man chuckled. “No need to be on guard. However, the Prince’s royal retinue does not easily go unnoticed.” The man gestured up and down, drawing focus to the Crownsguard outfits they wore. 

Prompto looked down at his outfit and then at the others. “Uh, maybe we should dress a little differently tomorrow? We don’t want a mob at the dock when we get to Altissia…”

“A wise choice.” The man turned toward Noct, looking him directly in the eyes. “We wouldn’t want to delay the marriage of a prince to his….. true love?” None of the other three took notice, but as the man turned he gave Noct a sly wink. The man tipped his hat toward the others walked slowly down the pier toward the parking lot. 

Noct took a step back, shaken. He felt torn open - exposed somehow. The look in the man’s eyes as he winked was one of the most unnerving things he had ever experienced. Or was it his words? True love…

“Noct, are you all right?” Noct heard Gladio’s voice, muffled as if he were in a dream. Noct shook his head and took a deep breath, trying to loosen the tightness in his chest. Gladio wore a concerned look, which was totally unlike him.  
“Yeah, I’m fine.” Noct quickly turned his head away. He ran his hands through his hair and straightened his long black jacket. “Can we just get to the room and chill out for a while?”

“Yeah, but what was that about? That guy was creepy as hell… and what was up with that hat?” Prompto puffed his chest out and tipped a pretend hat. “A man of no importance!” he said mockingly. 

Ignis stepped back, a confused look on his face. He hesitated for a second, looking as though he was unsure about something. He presented the room key to Gladio. “You all head to the room. I think I may relax on the dock for a bit. I will be back before nightfall.” Before Gladio had a chance to ask questions, Ignis had already walked past the bar and halfway down the dock. 

“What’s up with him?” Gladio thought for a moment and shrugged. “Come on boys, let’s see if this room is as fancy as the rest of this place.”

“Woo hoo! Bath time!” Prompto ran past Gladio, snatching the key from his hand as he went by. Gladio sighed, turning to Noct. “Guess the bathroom will be occupied for a while.”

“Whatever. I just need to chill out for a bit.” Noct walked past Gladio without acknowledging him, lost in thought. 

—————

(Music - Sunset Waltz)

The sun was beautiful. It cast a purple glow across the water as it set on the horizon. A resort attendant walked by with a long match, lighting the tiki torches that lined the dock. Ignis sat quietly on the bench, looking out to sea. Something was wrong. He didn’t know what, but he could feel that today something inside him had broken loose. It was a feeling deep in his chest - an emptiness, but a quickening excitement as well. It was painful, joyful, and terrifying all at the same time. He had never experienced anything like it before.

He took his gloves off, folded them, and put them in his jacket pocket. Placing his hands on his chest, he took several deep breaths. Under most circumstances Ignis was able to rationalize just about anything. Calculated and cerebral, it made sense why he was the tactician for the group. Cool heads prevail, and he could formulate a plan under the most stressful of situations. He was trusted by the others because he was able to keep his emotions in check. But what was this feeling? He didn’t like it. 

The sun had dipped below the horizon and the stars had become visible. The smooth sound of bossa nova drifted from the bar, mixed with chatter and laughter. The evening had come, and Ignis knew it was time to return to the room. He stood up slowly, not wanting to leave, but knowing the others would come looking for him if he stayed out much longer. He made his way toward the front of the pier, but something was holding him back. Turning back toward the dock, he walked to the edge of the water and bent down onto his knees. 

Ignis stared down into the clear ocean water, barely able to see his reflection. Only seconds of daylight remained. The reflection stared back at him, shimmering with the waves. The look on his face was tense, and it was almost too much to see himself in such a state of turmoil. Frustrated, he reached down and plunged his hand through the image. His reflection quickly faded as the water was displaced. He sat completely still for another minute before he stood up, took a deep breath, and continued toward the hotel room.

“What is the matter with me?”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ignis acknowledges a flame that has been flickering in him for a long time. Noct experiences a grief deeper than he has ever known.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! The music suggestions may not line up with the story progression, but they fit the mood of the scene they are paired with.

(Music - Dewdrops at Dawn)

“I should have complained.”

Ignis opened his eyes for the twentieth time that evening. He glanced at the clock on the wall across the room - 3:15 AM. Despite having padded the floor with three additional blankets, he still couldn’t get comfortable. He could understand to some degree why Gladio had insisted upon having a whole bed to himself. His huge frame hung off the edges of the bed even when someone else wasn’t in it. But Prompto and Noct had spent a good 15 minutes arguing about who would get to sleep in the bed. Did they consider that perhaps they could share? Or, heaven forbid, that Ignis might want to sleep in the bed rather than on the floor for a change?

He stood up and made his way to the bathroom. Taking care to be as quiet as possible, he opened the door slowly and tiptoed inside. Perhaps a splash of water on his face would clear his mind enough to fall back asleep. He started to reach for the light switch, but he stopped himself. The moon was bright tonight, and the whole room was lit with a soft glow. No reason to turn on the light, he thought. He turned the handle of the faucet and cupped his hands together under the cool stream of water. He plunged his face into his hands, feeling the wet chill soothe his hot skin. Reaching for a towel, he shook the excess water off of his face and dried the droplets that remained.

Ignis hung up the towel on the hook beside the sink. He looked into the mirror and observed his reflection for a moment. His turquoise eyes stared back at him, sparkling in the moonlight shining through the window. It was a sparkle that few got the opportunity to see, as it was generally obscured by his glasses. Only when he was sleeping or showering did he not wear them. He had always been told by his mother that he that the most beautiful eyes she had ever seen. It was probably just her being a doting mother - no one else had ever told him that. 

Quietly, he opened the door and made his way back into the bedroom. As he walked back to the blankets on the floor, he noticed a draft coming from the window beside the bed. A chill ran through his body, his thin silk pajamas not being enough to protect him from the cold. The night was cooler than average for southern Leide - certainly too cool to have the window open. Probably Gladio’s fault, he thought. Ignis turned toward the window and reached for the handles. He pulled it down as much as he could without making a great deal of racket. It was closed just enough to keep him from freezing through the night. 

The moon shone just as brightly in the main room of the hotel as it did in the bathroom. Ignis’s eyes were drawn along the path of the beams, to the bed directly aside the window. Noctis was peacefully sleeping. His normally ash-colored hair took on a bluish tone in the moonlight. Thick but wispy, it brushed across his ear in the light breeze flowing from the window. The moonlight gave his skin an ethereal glow, standing out starkly against the darkness of his hair. At 20 years of age, he still maintained the soft skin of youth. However, the square of his jaw and the dusting of stubble across his face was enough to indicate that the young prince was indeed a man. It was as if the gods themselves had illuminated Noct and placed him upon display that evening. 

Ignis was breathless. He had known Noct since they were children - since he was assigned advisor to the Prince of Lucis at the age of 4. Ignis had always cared deeply for Noct and felt a unique connection to him. Hardly a day had gone by in the past 17 years that he had not been in communication with him in one way or another. They were close, this was true. But tonight something was different. In that moment Ignis was keenly aware of how Noct’s hair obscured his eyes as he slept. Somehow his skin had a softness that he had never noticed before. The way his chest rose and fell so peacefully as he took each breath. Each of these observations sparked a feeling in Ignis that was remarkably intense. 

He couldn’t move. Ignis was stunned, captivated by the beauty of the young man that slept before him. What were these feelings, and why were they arising now after all these years? Then again, perhaps this was not a recent development. Now that he thought about it, the emotions that were bursting out of him were not entirely unfamiliar. Had he been in denial? These feelings had been boiling under the surface since before they left Insomnia. Had they only been suppressed because his of his duty to the Crown…

“Stop this nonsense!” he whispered to himself. Ignis shook his head, bringing himself back to reality. Prince Noctis was his responsibility, not the object of his affection. These feelings were not real. They were simply a distraction from his sworn duty - to protect the prince and to guide him to become the king he was destined to be. He grasped the bottom of his nightshirt firmly and balled it up in his fist. This was ludicrous. 

Noct stirred. He opened his eyes ever so slightly and lifted his head from the pillow. “Iggy…” he mumbled. “You all right?”

Ignis turned away, his face hot with shame. “Fine. Just getting some water.” He bolted from the spot by the window where he had been observing Noct and returned to his pile of blankets on the floor. Laying down, he wrapped himself up in the blankets as fast as he could and turned his back to Noct. 

“Mm... Okay…” Noct’s eyes drooped, and soon he fell back into the embrace of sleep. 

Ignis laid on the floor, every muscle in his body tense. He would not move, not breathe, lest he be enticed once again into thinking of Noct. He closed his eyes, willing away the thoughts. “This will not consume me….”

———

Noct sat up in bed and opened his eyes. The sun came streaming through the window, nearly blinding the newly awoken prince. “Ugh… what time is it?” He thrust his fists into the air as he stretched his lean arms. 

“Time to get your ass up. We’ve been waiting for you to go to breakfast.” Gladio put down his book and stood from the chair across the room. 

“Dude, it’s about time. I’m starving…” Prompto echoed. He sprinted over to Noct, grabbed him by the arm and yanked him out of bed. “I was about to wake you up myself!” Noct nearly tumbled over, but steadied himself and managed to regain his balance. He gave Prompto an annoyed look and made his way to the window.

It must have been nearly 9 AM. Noct pulled the shade down, shunning the morning sun. He reached to the nightstand and took a drink of water from the cup he had placed there the night before. As he brought it to his lips, the door to the room suddenly opened. He nearly dropped the cup, startled by Ignis’s unexpected entrance.

(Music - Cartanica)

Ignis was dressed for the day. He looked almost too well-dressed for that time of the morning, his boots perfectly shined and his clothes crisply pressed. Wearing a solemn expression that stood in contrast to his attire, he held the day’s newspaper in his hand. He flashed a look across the room, locking eyes with Noct for a millisecond before turning to the others.

Noct rubbed his eyes and ran his hand through his hair. “What’s with that look?” 

Ignis reached out his hand and offered the newspaper to Gladio. Gladio gave Ignis a confused side-eye and took it. As he read the front page, his hardened expression melted into one of sadness and disbelief. “It’s in all the papers.” Ignis said, looking down at the floor. 

Noct had awakened enough to realize something serious was going on. Barefoot, he made his way across the room toward Gladio. “What is?” he asked anxiously. 

Prompto leaned toward Gladio, reading the paper over his shoulder. His eyes scanned the headline and his face went white. He took a step back. “Insomnia… falls?” 

Noct had only made it halfway across the room before he heard Prompto read the headline aloud. He froze in place, shooting a cold look at Prompto and Gladio. “Is this your idea of a joke?” The prince rushed over and attempted to snatch the newspaper from Gladio’s hand. Gladio dodged his advance, side-stepping and turning around as he began to read the news aloud. 

Noct was in shock. Gladio’s voice was clear as day, but the words were nothing but a murmur to him. The room melted away as he dissociated for a moment from reality. It was too crazy to believe. What about the treaty? The barrier? Even the Old Wall… How could this even be possible? Noct was numb, and in denial. He had to see for himself. 

“...Lies.” Noct shot back to reality, burning with rage. It had to be an Imperial scheme. “We have to go back. I need to see for myself.”

Ignis furled his brow, concerned. “Are you sure that’s a good idea? It could be dangerous.”

“Yeah. Let’s go.”

——

(Music - Dawn)

The blade of Gladio’s greatsword cleaved the air, landing a fatal blow upon the final Magitek trooper. It fell to the ground, and Ignis stepped over its lifeless body. “There, up ahead.” He signaled forward, toward the cliff. The four proceeded, stopping at the edge and overlooking the valley. The Crown City could be seen far in the distance, shrouded in the morning mist. Or was it smoke? It was difficult to make out, but clearly all was not well.

“What the…” Prompto stood agape, in disbelief. Squinting his eyes, he peered through the haze as he tried to get a better view. “I don’t know what it is, but something bad is definitely going on.”

Noct stepped forward, standing just at the edge of the cliff. The toes of his shoes hung on the precipice, and small specks of dust floated down into the valley. He stood silently for a moment, not moving a single muscle. Smoke rose from the center of the city and buildings glowed red with fire. Though it was too far away to see many details, it was clear that his home, his Kingdom, had fallen. 

Gladio stood firmly behind them, arms crossed and wearing a cold expression. He did not approach Prompto or Noct, giving them space to take in the view for themselves. On top of that, he was so overwhelmed by the state of affairs that he needed breathing room for himself. Their families, friends… Iris. Gladio turned his back to the overlook and bowed his head. He said nothing. 

Ignis appeared torn. He took his glasses off, squinted his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. He wanted to step forward and be supportive, but he didn’t know what to do or what to say. This made it even more difficult for him as he struggled to manage his own thoughts. Processing his own feelings while being concerned for Noct’s wellbeing was crushingly heavy. 

The uncomfortable silence was interrupted by a vibration and a ring. Noct peeled his eyes away from the horrifying scene and reached into his jacket pocket. He pulled out his phone and brought it to his ear. “Hello, Cor? What the hell’s going on?” he said, a quiver in his voice. He placed the phone on speaker so the others could hear. 

“Where are you?” Cor asked, skipping the pleasantries. 

“Outside the city. There’s no way back in. Imperials blocked the entrance.”

“Makes sense.” Cor said coldly. 

Noct’s face flushed with anger. “Makes sense? Are you serious!” he yelled into the phone. “What about any of this makes sense? The news just told me I’m dead, along with Luna and…”

“Listen.” Cor interrupted firmly. “I’m headed out to Hammerhead. We can talk more there.” There was a brief hesitation. “And about the king…. it’s true.”

Noct was speechless. The redness of the anger in his face quickly faded to a pallid emptiness. Paralyzed, he waited for Cor’s next words.

“You know where to find me. Get moving.” The phone beeped to signal the call had ended. All four seemed frozen in time. For what seemed like an eternity, no one spoke. No one moved. 

Ignis broke the silence, stepping forward. “Noct…” he said softly. 

At that moment, Noct broke. He fell to his knees, overcome with grief and despair. He buried his face into his hands as he wept - sobbing, choking, gasping for air. The death of his father, his city, his Kingdom…. it was all too much. Tears leaked through his fingers and dropped onto the dusty ground. 

The intensity of Noct’s sobs pierced Ignis’s heart. He couldn’t tolerate seeing Noct experience such pain. He wanted to do something - comfort him, talk to him. Tell him everything was all right. Let him know that it’s okay to cry. If he could have taken the hurt away - absorbed it into himself somehow, he would have done it in a heartbeat. But he knew there was nothing to be done. He felt helpless that all he could do was bear witness. Ignis bent at the knees, bringing himself to Noct’s level. Tears began to well up in his eyes. “Noct. I’m sorry…” 

Before Ignis realized what was happening, Noct lunged forward. He wrapped his arms tightly around Ignis, burying his face into his neck. Ignis nearly fell over, but found himself seated on the ground with Noct in his arms. Noct’s crying intensified once again, muffled into the shoulder his advisor and friend.

“Iggy…” Noct cried. “Iggy…” He repeated it over and over again between sobs. It was the only thing he could say at the moment. Ignis initially had stiffened up in surprise as Noct clung to him, but as he heard Noct call his name the tension all melted away. His cries penetrated Ignis’s soul, and all he could do was wrap his arms around the prince and hold him tight. He placed his hand on the back of Noct’s head and drew him in closer.

Ignis’s instinct was to kiss him. To lower his head and place a gentle kiss on the side of his neck. To stroke his beautiful ash-colored hair and whisper in his ear. “It’s all right. It’s all right. I’m here. I’ll always be here.” It took every bit of willpower Ignis had to refrain from giving in to that instinct. All he wanted in the world was to heal the pain Noct was experiencing. The pain of someone he cared about so much. The pain of someone...

“We don’t have time for this, come on.” Ignis reluctantly let go as Gladio grabbed Noct around the torso and lifted him up. He placed the prince upright, on his feet. “Dry it up. Let’s get going.” He turned around and started walking back toward the blockade. 

Noct wiped his eyes with his hands, clearing the tears from his face. He reached down to brush the dust off his pants, and took a deep breath to quell the urge to sob further. “...okay.”

Prompto gave one more glance to the ruined city in the distance before he turned to follow Gladio. He tried to hide it as he wiped away the glint of a tear in his eye. He followed behind as if he carried the weight of the world on his shoulders. 

Ignis pulled himself off the ground and stood up. His pants were covered in dirt, which under normal circumstances would have been heavily irritating. His pants were the farthest thing from his mind at the moment. He turned his eyes toward Noct, who was staring into the distance at what had once been the capital city of the Kingdom he was to inherit. His dusty coat billowed lightly in the breeze, and Ignis noticed a different energy from him. An older, less childish energy. It was as if in the midst of Noct’s breakdown he had bid farewell to his childhood, recognizing it was time to grow up. He turned toward Ignis, meeting his gaze. The connection only lasted for a fraction of a second, but for the first time he saw through Noct’s eyes and into his soul. Noct must have realized this, because he quickly looked away. The emotion he had shown over the past few minutes was more than he had wanted to share.

Noct’s expression became steely. “Let’s go.” He said coldly. He made his way down the path, leaving Ignis behind and following in Gladio and Prompto’s footsteps. 

Ignis felt a searing pain through his heart. Had Noct not understood the meaning of what just took place? The intimacy and vulnerability that the two of them had in that moment of raw emotion? Noct’s heart had shattered in front of him, and he had chosen Ignis to be the one to hold the pieces. That must mean something, right? 

Ignis closed his eyes and reached his hand up to his collar. Between his thumb and forefinger, he could feel the wetness of Noct’s tears still on his jacket. He took the jacket off, folded it neatly, and held it gently in his hands. With a whirlwind of emotions spinning through his chest, he brought the collar of the jacket up to his face. 

“Noct…” 

He pressed the collar of the jacket into his cheek and closed his eyes. The moisture of the prince’s tears dampened his face, and a single tear from his own eye soaked into the cloth. It was in that moment that Ignis knew he had fallen in love with Noct.


End file.
